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Re: parental discipline (smacking).

Posted: Tue Dec 08, 2009 8:57 am
by Ashu
SuperSaiyan wrote:yet again, no suggestion as to a punishment that will stop me from joyriding in your car :?

ToToRo wrote:one my mother used to whoop the **Filtered** out of my ass when i messed up and guess wat i grew up to be a damn good man


aye, I do not fear my parents, I respect them for it always have

you need that, "if I don't do this I might get in trouble" factor...

and imo, a timeout is not enough motivation

Ashu wrote:SS what you say makes no sense and if you laugh and spit in the face of modern psychology i can only pity you...I know a lot of parents say "Fudge those psycho babble idiots imma gonna educate me them kids like me daddy used to do..." but modern man has learned that its more to education that what meets the eye...


yes thats it, mock those who do not agree with you, excellent...

one does not need a degree in head shrinking to be a parent and to blindly follow it is stupid, who is raising your kids them or you?

If prison isn't a good enough reason for you,not all the beating in the world could change that...
Timeout is a stupid invention that's kinda worse than a spank...
I do not mock anyone SS but since you fully ignore hundreds of years of study...its maybe the only way to make you understand what i said...

Re: parental discipline (smacking).

Posted: Tue Dec 08, 2009 8:59 am
by Brdavs
@[KMA]Avenger

Again, why would it matter?

And yes I read it. The disclaimer of how far youre willing to take it doesnt change a single thing.

Its still unnecessary and the level of pain/fear doesnt change the principle of the matter.
Just cos you dont hit the kid black and blue doesnt make it vastly different. The same psychological principles apply.

So now that you cant find a solid argument youre gonna resort to disquallifying me based on the fact wether I do or do not have children lol?

Re: parental discipline (smacking).

Posted: Tue Dec 08, 2009 9:01 am
by Iƒrit
how do you know if your volince has'nt caused any emotinal or mental harm?? Are you asking your child? Are they being asked by a third party? Are they scared to anwser the truth? Or is this just a matter of hey I know what my child feels/thinks?

Or are we just gonna minimize our violence by saying "I only tapped them.", "I didnt leave a mark.", "Well the are listening, so it must work." ect ect ect

Again IMO if you have to use violence in any form to raise your child you aint ready to be a parent, bottom line.

Re: parental discipline (smacking).

Posted: Tue Dec 08, 2009 9:02 am
by Ashu
SuperSaiyan wrote:
Ashu wrote:
SuperSaiyan wrote:yet again, no suggestion as to a punishment that will stop me from joyriding in your car :?

ToToRo wrote:one my mother used to whoop the **Filtered** out of my ass when i messed up and guess wat i grew up to be a damn good man


aye, I do not fear my parents, I respect them for it always have

you need that, "if I don't do this I might get in trouble" factor...

and imo, a timeout is not enough motivation

Ashu wrote:SS what you say makes no sense and if you laugh and spit in the face of modern psychology i can only pity you...I know a lot of parents say "Fudge those psycho babble idiots imma gonna educate me them kids like me daddy used to do..." but modern man has learned that its more to education that what meets the eye...


yes thats it, mock those who do not agree with you, excellent...

one does not need a degree in head shrinking to be a parent and to blindly follow it is stupid, who is raising your kids them or you?

If prison isn't a good enough reason for you,not all the beating in the world could change that...
Timeout is a stupid invention that's kinda worse than a spank...
I do not mock anyone SS but since you fully ignore hundreds of years of study...its maybe the only way to make you understand what i said...


and you fully ignore centries of practiced discipline :lol:

so your 12 year old is gonna go to prison for joy riding in your car?
whats worse, 5 across the eyes, or a criminal record?

i don't know any 12 year old that can jack a car...and that "discipline" is nothing more than senseless violence and breading fear into the child.

Re: parental discipline (smacking).

Posted: Tue Dec 08, 2009 9:06 am
by [KMA]Avenger
Brdavs wrote:@[KMA]Avenger

Again, why would it matter?

And yes I read it. The disclaimer of how far youre willing to take it doesnt change a single thing.

Its still unnecessary and the level of pain/fear doesnt change the principle of the matter.
Just cos you dont hit the kid black and blue doesnt make it vastly different. The same psychological principles apply.

So now that you cant find a solid argument youre gonna resort to disquallifying me based on the fact wether I do or do not have children lol?



i'm glad you did read it but i fear while you have read the opening post, you haven't fully understood it because (i assume) you dont have kids...how can you pass judgement on my parenting skills and fatherhood-from your side of the monitor your looking at if you dont have kids?

and just for the record, i have a VERY loving relationship with my sons, i tell them i love them every single day, i go out of my way in fact to make it clear to them how much i love them.

Re: parental discipline (smacking).

Posted: Tue Dec 08, 2009 9:06 am
by Iƒrit
SuperSaiyan wrote:
Crying NOOOOO wrote:how do you know if your volince has'nt caused any emotinal or mental harm?? Are you asking your child? Are they being asked by a third party? Are they scared to anwser the truth? Or is this just a matter of hey I know what my child feels/thinks?

Or are we just gonna minimize our violence by saying "I only tapped them.", "I didnt leave a mark.", "Well the are listening, so it must work." ect ect ect

Again IMO if you have to use violence in any form to raise your child you aint ready to be a parent, bottom line.


and how do you now being a fluffy doormat isn't having the same darn effect?

If your gonna defelect by asking a question then dont respond to anything I post, I aint bein an ass just pointing out your avoiding what I posted, and I find that offense in a topic where we debate.

Re: parental discipline (smacking).

Posted: Tue Dec 08, 2009 9:06 am
by RoKeT
this topic is silly now i agree that child abuse is wrong i guess i just don't agree with your terms on child abuse lol smacking a wrist or a butt for something they do wrong is a okay with me actually it's wat i do ;) in all actuallity when my daughter bit me i bit her back OMG guess wat she never ever bit anyone again lol

Re: parental discipline (smacking).

Posted: Tue Dec 08, 2009 9:09 am
by Brdavs
SuperSaiyan wrote:
so now you are saying that slapping a child on the wrist once, is just as tramatic as beating them to a pulp?


Dont BS me and put words im my mouth, you know a slap on the wrist doesnt work nor is it what we`re discussing.

You have to reach a certain treashold of fear & pain for the pain reflex to assirt itself for the future. Kids dont instinctivly shy away from stuff cos you gently padded them on the head.
Dont lie to yourself that a "slap on the wrist amongst friends" is what we`re talking about. Thats basically a "no" you`re advocating as insufficient.

We`re talking about a good old fashioned spanking that produces bigarse tears etc.
And thats trauma right there, might not be blunt trauma but thats entirely besides the point.

Re: parental discipline (smacking).

Posted: Tue Dec 08, 2009 9:11 am
by Ashu
SuperSaiyan wrote:
Ashu wrote:
SuperSaiyan wrote:
Ashu wrote:
SuperSaiyan wrote:yet again, no suggestion as to a punishment that will stop me from joyriding in your car :?

ToToRo wrote:one my mother used to whoop the **Filtered** out of my ass when i messed up and guess wat i grew up to be a damn good man


aye, I do not fear my parents, I respect them for it always have

you need that, "if I don't do this I might get in trouble" factor...

and imo, a timeout is not enough motivation

Ashu wrote:SS what you say makes no sense and if you laugh and spit in the face of modern psychology i can only pity you...I know a lot of parents say "Fudge those psycho babble idiots imma gonna educate me them kids like me daddy used to do..." but modern man has learned that its more to education that what meets the eye...


yes thats it, mock those who do not agree with you, excellent...

one does not need a degree in head shrinking to be a parent and to blindly follow it is stupid, who is raising your kids them or you?

If prison isn't a good enough reason for you,not all the beating in the world could change that...
Timeout is a stupid invention that's kinda worse than a spank...
I do not mock anyone SS but since you fully ignore hundreds of years of study...its maybe the only way to make you understand what i said...


and you fully ignore centries of practiced discipline :lol:

so your 12 year old is gonna go to prison for joy riding in your car?
whats worse, 5 across the eyes, or a criminal record?

i don't know any 12 year old that can jack a car...and that "discipline" is nothing more than senseless violence and breading fear into the child.



tell me then, what would you do?

steps to joyride:

1 - take mommies keys
2 - turn on car
3 - push the darn peddle :-s

if a 12 year old is incapable of that, then you failed anyway
Brdavs wrote:@[KMA]Avenger

Again, why would it matter?

And yes I read it. The disclaimer of how far youre willing to take it doesnt change a single thing.

Its still unnecessary and the level of pain/fear doesnt change the principle of the matter.
Just cos you dont hit the kid black and blue doesnt make it vastly different. The same psychological principles apply.

So now that you cant find a solid argument youre gonna resort to disquallifying me based on the fact wether I do or do not have children lol?



so now you are saying that slapping a child on the wrist once, is just as tramatic as beating them to a pulp?

Crying NOOOOO wrote:how do you know if your volince has'nt caused any emotinal or mental harm?? Are you asking your child? Are they being asked by a third party? Are they scared to anwser the truth? Or is this just a matter of hey I know what my child feels/thinks?

Or are we just gonna minimize our violence by saying "I only tapped them.", "I didnt leave a mark.", "Well the are listening, so it must work." ect ect ect

Again IMO if you have to use violence in any form to raise your child you aint ready to be a parent, bottom line.


and how do you now being a fluffy doormat isn't having the same darn effect?

Wow brilliant.If the kid WANTS to do something bad then its being something a beating or anything can do...It doesn't take a genius to just hide the keys...
If you slap him on the wrist once you WILL do it again,and it will get worse every time...

Re: parental discipline (smacking).

Posted: Tue Dec 08, 2009 9:13 am
by Iƒrit
SuperSaiyan wrote:
Crying NOOOOO wrote:
SuperSaiyan wrote:
Crying NOOOOO wrote:how do you know if your volince has'nt caused any emotinal or mental harm?? Are you asking your child? Are they being asked by a third party? Are they scared to anwser the truth? Or is this just a matter of hey I know what my child feels/thinks?

Or are we just gonna minimize our violence by saying "I only tapped them.", "I didnt leave a mark.", "Well the are listening, so it must work." ect ect ect

Again IMO if you have to use violence in any form to raise your child you aint ready to be a parent, bottom line.


and how do you now being a fluffy doormat isn't having the same darn effect?

If your gonna defelect by asking a question then dont respond to anything I post, I aint bein an ass just pointing out your avoiding what I posted, and I find that offense in a topic where we debate.



I'm not deflecting anything, that is a valid response, you cannot know what something is going to have an effect on, you can only do what YOU think is right and hope for the best mate

Its common sense, postive things generate postive things, negative things generate negitive things. Violence is a negative thing there isnt a single thing about violence that is postive even in self defense.

Re: parental discipline (smacking).

Posted: Tue Dec 08, 2009 9:13 am
by [KMA]Avenger
SuperSaiyan wrote:1 - take mommies keys
2 - turn on car
3 - push the darn peddle :-s



my mrs cant even get that far, but my eldest can because i trust my son to go out and start the car while i finish getting ready.


Brdavs wrote:
SuperSaiyan wrote:
so now you are saying that slapping a child on the wrist once, is just as tramatic as beating them to a pulp?


Dont BS me and put words im my mouth, you know a slap on the wrist doesnt work nor is it what we`re discussing.


i beg to differ mate, a slap on the wrist or leg is EXACTLY what we are talking about, and it does work because while i may not be able to speak for other parents who use smacking as a form of discipline, my sons never made the same mistake twice, and as i have said, i have had no need to smack any of my kids in a LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG time :-)

Re: parental discipline (smacking).

Posted: Tue Dec 08, 2009 9:15 am
by Brdavs
SuperSaiyan wrote:
Brdavs wrote:
SuperSaiyan wrote:
so now you are saying that slapping a child on the wrist once, is just as tramatic as beating them to a pulp?


Dont BS me and put words im my mouth, you know a slap on the wrist doesnt work nor is it what we`re discussing.



that is exactly what we are discussing


Then you have no idea what we`re discussing or youre consoling yourself that what youre doing is more innocent than it is.

If you physically discipline your child to a degree that he instinctivly avoids an action just because he associates pain/discipline from you with it, you`re not talking a "slap on the wrist".

If you dont disciplin him that far then guess what, you`re not achieving anything anyways and you can stop. You`re on the "dont raise by hitting" bandwagon. You use human contact to reaffirm the verbal message youre trying to get through. Glad to have you aboard. :-D

Re: parental discipline (smacking).

Posted: Tue Dec 08, 2009 9:16 am
by Ashu
What you should do is put the thinking cap on like millions of parents do...

But here's a freeby:TALK to him long a much about this,make him understand the who and what and where and whatnot...It works *looks at self*.
Also i have a question:if a "adult" will do something like put his hands on something really hot and knowing it and gets burned...who will slap him?Will he slap himself or do it again?

Re: parental discipline (smacking).

Posted: Tue Dec 08, 2009 9:21 am
by Iƒrit
SuperSaiyan wrote:
Crying NOOOOO wrote:
SuperSaiyan wrote:
Crying NOOOOO wrote:
SuperSaiyan wrote:
Crying NOOOOO wrote:how do you know if your volince has'nt caused any emotinal or mental harm?? Are you asking your child? Are they being asked by a third party? Are they scared to anwser the truth? Or is this just a matter of hey I know what my child feels/thinks?

Or are we just gonna minimize our violence by saying "I only tapped them.", "I didnt leave a mark.", "Well the are listening, so it must work." ect ect ect

Again IMO if you have to use violence in any form to raise your child you aint ready to be a parent, bottom line.


and how do you now being a fluffy doormat isn't having the same darn effect?

If your gonna defelect by asking a question then dont respond to anything I post, I aint bein an ass just pointing out your avoiding what I posted, and I find that offense in a topic where we debate.



I'm not deflecting anything, that is a valid response, you cannot know what something is going to have an effect on, you can only do what YOU think is right and hope for the best mate

Its common sense, postive things generate postive things, negative things generate negitive things. Violence is a negative thing there isnt a single thing about violence that is postive even in self defense.


common sense, so few people actually have that these days...

and aa negative x a negative = a positve :o
and if you cant use or ont have common sense enough to understand then your dont belong being a parent peroid! And sarcasm is also considered abusive, we are talkin about something entirely different then advanced math.

Re: parental discipline (smacking).

Posted: Tue Dec 08, 2009 9:23 am
by Ashu
You obviously didn't understand what i said...
Explain,tell,show,etc...all part of talking all will help you in education..
Also trust is very important...