I'm starting a religion.
Posted: Sat Sep 13, 2008 7:49 pm
Hey folks, I'm starting a new religion... yeah... the center of this religion is Beer. The following is the first (and currently the only) sacred text of this religion, I'm working on more... bear in mind it's not complete, I'm still writing 
Enjoy:
Holy Sacred Church of the All-Encompassing Beer
Document 0000000000000001 revision 00001a
Sep. 11 2008
ehh... right
Here is are the fundamentals of religion :
The Universe we live in is inside of a neutron that is part of the All-Encompassing beer. You with me this far?
The Beer is located inside of Extrospace, the field of existance in which resides the Godentity. Nothing more is known about the Extrospace.
The Godentity is brewing the All-Encompassing Beer for his (or her) divine pleasure.
Nothing more is known about the Godentity; it is simply accepted that he (or she) is the all-powerful being in charge of everything.
Inside every subatomic particle of the All-Encompassing beer there are more Universes. Thus, there are countlessly many first-level Universes.
Inside every subatomic particle of everything inside any of the Universes is another Universe, and so forth recursively ad obliviam.
Thus, there are infinitely many Universes.
From this we can derive, that we and everything else is of absolutely no importance or meaning whatsoever.
Therefore, life has no meaning, there is no right and wrong; rather only things that are percieved as right or wrong by Humans
due to their conditioing by Society.
Now, the Godentity can't be botherd to give a flying rat's ass about us measly beings in all our infinite numbers. Can you blame her (or him)?
However, inside of the Universes there are very powerful beings that may as well be Gods. These are called the gods.
The Gods are responsible for everything that is divine and unexplicable and attributed to the supernatural, such as socks missing from your dryer.
These are the basic principles of our Religion, the rest is up to interpretation.
Currently I'm working on more refined beliefs about the Gods and detailed info on rituals, prayers, and other such things. Will post updates soon!
~+Ishmayeck+~
Enjoy:Holy Sacred Church of the All-Encompassing Beer
Document 0000000000000001 revision 00001a
Sep. 11 2008
ehh... right
Here is are the fundamentals of religion :
The Universe we live in is inside of a neutron that is part of the All-Encompassing beer. You with me this far?
The Beer is located inside of Extrospace, the field of existance in which resides the Godentity. Nothing more is known about the Extrospace.
The Godentity is brewing the All-Encompassing Beer for his (or her) divine pleasure.
Nothing more is known about the Godentity; it is simply accepted that he (or she) is the all-powerful being in charge of everything.
Inside every subatomic particle of the All-Encompassing beer there are more Universes. Thus, there are countlessly many first-level Universes.
Inside every subatomic particle of everything inside any of the Universes is another Universe, and so forth recursively ad obliviam.
Thus, there are infinitely many Universes.
From this we can derive, that we and everything else is of absolutely no importance or meaning whatsoever.
Therefore, life has no meaning, there is no right and wrong; rather only things that are percieved as right or wrong by Humans
due to their conditioing by Society.
Now, the Godentity can't be botherd to give a flying rat's ass about us measly beings in all our infinite numbers. Can you blame her (or him)?
However, inside of the Universes there are very powerful beings that may as well be Gods. These are called the gods.
The Gods are responsible for everything that is divine and unexplicable and attributed to the supernatural, such as socks missing from your dryer.
These are the basic principles of our Religion, the rest is up to interpretation.
Currently I'm working on more refined beliefs about the Gods and detailed info on rituals, prayers, and other such things. Will post updates soon!
~+Ishmayeck+~
).
