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Frankly though, it's none of yall's business. <_<

Still, I shall vent: If you don't like whine, feel free to skip, I know i too will be disgusted with this petulant drivel in a few moments.

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The only Girl i've ever loved, was born with roses in her eyes*... yet all the ones I wish as friends seem intent on rectifying that un-rectifiable deficit by sticking such plants, thorns and all into their craniums.... and as painful as those things must have been to put in, it is a nightmare to extract them - kindness doesn't seem to work - yet i'm no jerk - but because of that I cannot believe I'm the idol they would make of me, and must make at least an attempt to demonstrate that.

Inaction only leads to deception, but action leads to despair - both are painful - geh, I'm glad I don't believe in karma, else my heart would be one bloody piece of flayed jerky.

Grrr... I've spent my life trying to pull the stick from my cyclopean orb, and having failed in that endeavor, what recourse or hope have I of threading the blinded landmines with emotionally swamped reason just begging to be trampled on?

I shut the door and they drown outside, to busy trying to open the lock than to swim for the surface, should I open it however, I fear a horrible internal death.

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It's bad enough when you want them and they don't want you... but I think it's a million times worse when you just want friendship, and they are intent on reversing their lives over you.
Moderation is the key both ways... but how to make that clear to those teeming masses who are already predisposed to blindness, let alone the thousand yard stare of those wrapped in the thick red curtain of passion?


* "... ♫ but then they buried her alive one evening 1945 ♪ ..."
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<selfedit>
Um.... Sorry about that. <_<
It's just that i've left to many wounded puppies in my wake to feel calm about the upcoming Pomeranian that is intent on hitching a ride to my pant leg.

<selfedit2>
Meh,
/-Me needs to get over it and play some Doom, go hunting, play golf, or somesuch.

Wow xeno, I'm not sure if I'm reading this right, but I'm getting the feeling someone's going a bit too over the top with something and your not on the same page. I hope things go better than they have.

That's not half as bad as having feelings for a girl and never quite working up to telling her, even when you are almost sure she felt the same way, and what makes it worse is knowing you may never see her again.

AncientAnubis wrote:That's not half as bad as having feelings for a girl and never quite working up to telling her, even when you are almost sure she felt the same way, and what makes it worse is knowing you may never see her again.

Ditto only we both told each other but both had partners at the time. weird thing is when we went out ppl would think we were married & her/my friends both thought we like the same soul ripped into two, one male and one female.

oh well if you love something, let it go.

If it comes back, then make a choice, but never worry about the past or where its been since you let go.

theres a lil life advice that'll help you out there

Best of luck with your issue.

i know the feeling! being friends is nice but if thats all you want and they want more! it gets awkward! and i got a girl! i liked her so much! it was unreal! but one day after 3/4 months se turns around and says she doesn't like me anymore! thats tough! but now we are friends and i do want it to be mre! but i know it can't and i have accpeted that! its stuf like this you need to move on from and enjoy life! you only get one chance at life! take it and squeeze it dry!

and xeno! things ill work out ok! maybe not exactly what you wanted but it'll be ok!

That's not half as bad as having feelings for a girl and never quite working up to telling her, even when you are almost sure she felt the same way, and what makes it worse is knowing you may never see her again.

Aye, and it is the knowledge of that pain - and in this case the pain of nerving up to ask and then getting shot down - that gives me the issue.

I can't string them along - you don't let a cat follow your car home in traffic... but at the same time I can't find a way to show said animals off without clocking them with a shoe or somesuch. If this were an actual cat, i'd just take it to the shelter, but unfortunantly, the metaphor ends long before the cat-food.

Wow xeno, I'm not sure if I'm reading this right, but I'm getting the feeling someone's going a bit too over the top with something and your not on the same page.

Someone is ready to drastically change their life, rather desperate to find company... we're not just on different pages, but in different books. I'm wading through 'The Idiot' and she's busy with Sleeping Beauty.
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Again, I just need to take thirty percent off the top. Remind myself that i'm not going to ruin her life, and that even were I capable of that, I believe there is something beyond.

That said, my issue then becomes "do I try and fix a mess"... untangle what I perceive as a personality in need of friends - and run the risk of shooting my own foot off, and taking her out with me - or just cut it off and forget about it - or search for a middle ground and risk blowing both.

Did I mention humanity is screwed?
Meh, I don't/didn't mean to turn this into sympathy thread - just was physically ill (stomach virus) and tired and had to vent, so ingore me.

This will blow over - and at that point, what was done is done.

sorry for hijacking your thread! lol,i have been sick for the past week or so as well! nd i have had exams which havnt improved things! but i hope eery thing turns out for the best xeno!

The Xeno wrote:

That's not half as bad as having feelings for a girl and never quite working up to telling her, even when you are almost sure she felt the same way, and what makes it worse is knowing you may never see her again.

Aye, and it is the knowledge of that pain - and in this case the pain of nerving up to ask and then getting shot down - that gives me the issue.

I can't string them along - you don't let a cat follow your car home in traffic... but at the same time I can't find a way to show said animals off without clocking them with a shoe or somesuch. If this were an actual cat, i'd just take it to the shelter, but unfortunantly, the metaphor ends long before the cat-food.

Wow xeno, I'm not sure if I'm reading this right, but I'm getting the feeling someone's going a bit too over the top with something and your not on the same page.

Someone is ready to drastically change their life, rather desperate to find company... we're not just on different pages, but in different books. I'm wading through 'The Idiot' and she's busy with Sleeping Beauty.
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Again, I just need to take thirty percent off the top. Remind myself that i'm not going to ruin her life, and that even were I capable of that, I believe there is something beyond.

That said, my issue then becomes "do I try and fix a mess"... untangle what I perceive as a personality in need of friends - and run the risk of shooting my own foot off, and taking her out with me - or just cut it off and forget about it - or search for a middle ground and risk blowing both.

Did I mention humanity is screwed?
Meh, I don't/didn't mean to turn this into sympathy thread - just was physically ill (stomach virus) and tired and had to vent, so ingore me.

This will blow over - and at that point, what was done is done.

If you come up with a master plan to fix it, let me know. Right now I'm trying my damndest to make things the way they should be, so at the very least I can say I left nothing undone.

If you have eyes for only 1 person more often than not you will never end up with them. wether it be through being over accomodating, being blinded to thier acctions showing thier feelings and intentions, being to "scared" or worried im sure is nicer, to let them know for the fact you may get rejected, and also that you are most likely already thier friend and either you, or they, dont want to ruin that.

Have eyes for no one and you will be able to see all thier intentions. And with having eyes for no one comes the simplicity of making your move through lack of "fear", of whatever it may be exactly that you are scared of in the first place. Not only that but you then have a choice

My advice to all of you guys is, tell them, just out right let them know, through whatever means necissary, if they go for it, you get what you have been stressing over for so long and your unessisarily crappy ordeal is over with. If they dont, 1 of 2 things will happen. You will both forget it happend, and remain as friends, with it being off your chest so you can relax alot better without all that pointless wondering. OR you will both feel awkward, perhaps to much, in which you will start to drift further appart, or just end it all together in 1 hit, depending on personalities. In which case, **Filtered** it, you WILL get over it, and you will no longer be in that position you clearly hate so, so much.

Being fixated on 1 girl (or guy for those females out there) will only cause you to be blinded to everything.

The Xeno wrote:It's bad enough when you want them and they don't want you... but I think it's a million times worse when you just want friendship, and they are intent on reversing their lives over you.

ironically, i'm the type to want to change my life for the one i love.
sadly, no one i'ved loved has ever returned the feelings.

most have wanted to be "just friends" while others have already been in a relationship, so could not have anything more than friendship.

the question is, can you ask her to let you go, and if you return her feelings eventually, can they accept them then?

pressuring only leads to hard choices, and usually broken hearts...*has had a few of those*

if she thinks you're worth changing her life for you. then she should be able to see, love is about caring about what's best for the OTHER person, not for yourself.

~_+Psi Kiya Trist+_~

You guys over complicate such simple matters. If you have to CHANGE YOUR LIFE for them. Do you honestly think that will work? Can you honestly expect to change your whole life, for 1 person, while remaining happy? If you cant keep yourself happy and supported in these matters you certainly wont be able to do so for them.

If you dont have a leg to stand on your not going to get anywhere with such things.

If it makes it easier for you, who so desperately need to complicate such simple things, uhhh, well....pretend your a ninja? Not sure exactly how it will help but worth a shot no?

Samurai or.....someone else extremely disiplined could work to.

Xeno - sounds like time to sit down and make some mathematical choices. Determine how much of yourself you want to give. Harsh and cold, but eventually doormats need to shake themselves off. I have made similar errors in the past in both real and cyber friendships. I have walked away from friends in RL because I can recognise the point where company and mateship turns to grief. And I have cut many of my ties to this community because I was shamed/stricken/overloaded at being piledriven repeatedly.

I personally have rebuilt my wall, and I only pop my head above it to accept occasional offers of tea and biscuits. My recommendation is you consider drastic action and keep it, if only to retain the person that is YOU.

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Just a note - someone in this thread wil think I am referring to them - it aint so. You already knew about The Wall. I feel safe here.

Spam Bot wrote:Xeno - sounds like time to sit down and make some mathematical choices. Determine how much of yourself you want to give. Harsh and cold, but eventually doormats need to shake themselves off. I have made similar errors in the past in both real and cyber friendships. I have walked away from friends in RL because I can recognise the point where company and mateship turns to grief. And I have cut many of my ties to this community because I was shamed/stricken/overloaded at being piledriven repeatedly.

I personally have rebuilt my wall, and I only pop my head above it to accept occasional offers of tea and biscuits. My recommendation is you consider drastic action and keep it, if only to retain the person that is YOU.

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Just a note - someone in this thread wil think I am referring to them - it aint so. You already knew about The Wall. I feel safe here.

Here here

Spam Bot wrote:Xeno - sounds like time to sit down and make some mathematical choices. Determine how much of yourself you want to give. Harsh and cold, but eventually doormats need to shake themselves off. I have made similar errors in the past in both real and cyber friendships. I have walked away from friends in RL because I can recognise the point where company and mateship turns to grief. And I have cut many of my ties to this community because I was shamed/stricken/overloaded at being piledriven repeatedly.

I personally have rebuilt my wall, and I only pop my head above it to accept occasional offers of tea and biscuits. My recommendation is you consider drastic action and keep it, if only to retain the person that is YOU.

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Just a note - someone in this thread wil think I am referring to them - it aint so. You already knew about The Wall. I feel safe here.

*brings battering ram*