Genesis
In the beginning was the Jason, the magic box of moving pictures and the pointless denizens of endless entropy. Jason created the Main, the Quantum, the Chaos, the Origins, the Ascension, the Forums and the Battle Corps.
One, very auspicious evening, the Omnipotent Jason awoke from its narcotic infused slumber and grudgingly reached towards the magic box. It found nothing. The Jason muddled with the magic box, and still it found nothing. Lacking any further great quantity of narcotics, resources by which to get/make these things and the over powering presence of boredom, the Jason hatched a plan.
Over the next seven months the Jason began a series of events that would construct the universe. During the first month, Jason found himself without a light bulb, so during the coding of the Main he bought a new one from the great Corner Shop and then commanded "Bloody Work you stupid thing!" and with that there was light.
During the second month of coding the Jason found himself a little tired and thirsty, so with all his might he separated the water from the tap and had a drink. With this, the denizens knew of oceans and water-earth differences.
In the third month of coding, the Jason made the first ground in the game by which the Denizens began to gather.
With all things now falling into place, during the fourth month the Jason created the stars in the SGW game background and the turn count mechanism so we would knew how to count time.
Everything was working, and the great being 'The Jason' could see all strands of the SGW Universe coming into place. The Money to get the Narcotics was in sight, but he found himself empathising more with the Denizens waiting for his world, the twinkles in the stars and more of his fantastic things..
So in the fifth month, the Jason began something new and added the many untrained units and attack turns and naquadah and he said unto them..Be fruitful and increase in number and fill the accounts in the games, and let the UU increase on the earth...
With all the new population and his world nearly completed Jason began the Beta Ages and the Denizens were finally allowed to begin encroaching upon his new territory. The prideful Jason looked down upon his minions. He found them to be sad though, so addressing the concerning issue he combined witt and mechanical understanding, the power of words and his knowledge of the moving pictures on the magic box and so he cast down the moving pictures to SGW so all denizens could see and relate. He altered his world and so began the Stargate Era..
On the seventh day... a sunday. The Jason finally had narcotics again and so rested and fell into a temporary slumber, awaiting for his new world to grow for many years before he would come to the game himself and edit it... but that is for future chapters...
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Here ends today's Lesson...
