parental discipline (smacking).

[[KMA]Avenger]

as everyone here knows, i hate big Govt and i especially hate being told by the Govt what i can and cannot do. i'm talking about parents not being allowed to discipline THEIR children how they see fit.

just so we are all on the same page from the start, i HATE with a passion cruelty to children, and thats not what we are talking about so i dont want anyone saying this is cruelty to children or accusing me of such disgusting acts....

as my children grew up i smacked them either on the leg or hand when the situation warranted it and only after all other forms of discipline where tried.
i NEVER once smacked my kids without also giving them an explanation of why they got smacked and what they did wrong, i haven't had to smack my kids in YEARS and are now so well behaved i get praise from everyone. now when they misbehave i only have to look at them and they know they are going to far, i dont have to raise my voice, shout or get upset.

and i'm not the only parent i know of who has used smacking as a form of discipline, and i see nothing wrong with it at all so long as its used in moderation and as a form of discipline and its not abused and used at whim....

do you agree?

[~[ Greased Gerbil ]~]

I agree whole-heartedly. When I stepped out of line, my dad gave me a good smack. I learned quick.

[[KMA]Avenger]

same here mate...

maybe if a few more parents used their brains and laid the law down at home we wouldn't have the scumbag-out of control-youth we have today...

damned politicly correct do-gooders could learn allot from a smack themselves!

[Deaths_Rider]

i agree but at the same time don't think the hit needs to be painfull in the slightest a tap is all that is needed as it shows they have had enough. but having said that by 6 or 7 it's too late too start the kid is set in there ways till there a teenager

[[KMA]Avenger]

i agree but at the same time don't think the hit needs to be painfull in the slightest a tap is all that is needed as it shows they have had enough. but having said that by 6 or 7 it's too late too start the kid is set in there ways till there a teenager

i think one of the worst things you could do to a kid (as far as smacking for discipline goes), is to start smacking them at such a late age, my eldest got his first smack on the hand at 2 years old. after that i would say to him "show me the hand that did it!" he would immediately put his hands behind his back and start crying. he never knew why he didn't want to show me his hand but somewhere in the back of his mind he knew that for me to ask which hand did it it wasn't because i was going to give him an ice cream lol . the point being that kids remember, and even now he is 12 years old he'll still put his hand behind his back if i ask which hand did it lol

anyways, going back to what you said, to start smacking a child at such a late age is a no no in my book....infact by the time they get to 5 or 6 i would not be expecting to smack them any more.

[Brdavs]

Stick is a hallmark of bad parenting and cutting corners.

There isnt a life lession you cant impare on your kid without hitting him.


And btw, "only till hes 5 or 6" lol?
Jesus, its your job as a parent to make sure your toddler doesnt get in harms way or does silly things at all times, not to use pavlovian reinforcement techniques to make due till hes able of adequate comprehension...

[Kit-Fox]

Sorry brdavs but you seem to have misunderstood the point of a smack.

Left alone an infant will try to put their hands into fire or the arc of an electricity discharge as to their minds they learn by feeling. Both such actions & others can lead to very serious injury or even death, by using a smack to prevent a child from taking such an action is actually protecting them & ensuring the continuation of your progeny for as long as possible.

As for transgressing social contructs well thats up to the parent, but smacking can lead the very behaviour you are trying to prevent & so should be used carefullly & appropiately.

[Brdavs]

Thats why stuff for babyproofing your house (stairs, electric plugs etc) exists.

You dont wait that your kid almosts electrecutes or horribly burns himself on the stove to introduce a pain stimulus to deter him from that in the future.
Thats a panicky response to a situation you allready fracked up by allowing it to get that far in the first place.

Your job is to safeguard him from harm not treat him like a puppy. Cos even avenger says, they remember. You can console yourself that its ok till 5 or 6 cos he`ll have no direct memory of it, but as he himself notices, inprints stay.

And all that "liberal softie" stuff is ironic considering this "softie" stuff promotes true "hard love" if you will.
You let your kid learn from hisown mistakes where those mistakes wont harm him. The lessions that hes not ready to learn that way are supposed to wait till his level of comprehension is adequate, not forced down his psyche using negative reinforcment.
Cos youre not teaching him that he will electrecute himself that way. You`re teaching him that A+B=pain from dada - so dont do A+B and nothing else. It makes a parents life easier, nothing else.
He`ll trully learn not to tuch the stove for the right reasons when he burns his finger for the first time and when he`s able of adequate comprehention that comes with appropriate age, not when you smack him for the first time cos he reached for it.

Cos the latter is not theaching him, is conditioning him.

Edit:
I`m not disputing that the pain reflex might not save him from some form of pain. I`m just saying that it`s not the only way to do it and that the "educational value" of a slap is overstated (dont intend to get into potential harm). You dont have to hit your kid for him to survive his first decade or prevent him to be an enfant terribile, thats my point heh.

[RoKeT]

i smack my daughters butt when she gets out of line and can i just say this... i love her to death anyone who has ever spoken with me knows that lol... and she is far more well behaved then any other toddler i know infact the "terrible twos" never even happened with her i find it to work quite well i do not beat my daughter nore would i ever she is my world but sometimes a little smack to let her know wat she is doing is wrong is exactly wat she needs

plus in america i'm pretty sure the law states something like if it doesn't leave a mark for more then 5 minutes it is legal which is far more then enough strength my daughter never even gets a red mark lol and she behaves after it lol

[Byrnes]

same here mate...

maybe if a few more parents used their brains and laid the law down at home we wouldn't have the scumbag-out of control-youth we have today...

damned politicly correct do-gooders could learn allot from a smack themselves!

Ive never been smacked really and ive came out good but i see where your coming from.

[Brdavs]

Thats why stuff for babyproofing your house (stairs, electric plugs etc) exists.

You dont wait that your kid almosts electrecutes or horribly burns himself on the stove to introduce a pain stimulus to deter him from that in the future.
Thats a panicky response to a situation you allready fracked up by allowing it to get that far in the first place.

Your job is to safeguard him from harm not treat him like a puppy. Cos even avenger says, they remember.

oh yes, because as long as you safegaurd your house, the rest of the planet is magically safe too?

if I pad the corners of my tables, there are no sharp objects outside my front door

*twitches nose* <- gennie reference

You let your 4 year old venture into the world unsuprevised?

[Ashu]

same here mate...

maybe if a few more parents used their brains and laid the law down at home we wouldn't have the scumbag-out of control-youth we have today...

damned politicly correct do-gooders could learn allot from a smack themselves!

Worse thing you can do to a child is smack him.The scumbags of today were "touched" and ignored.Discipline must be of the mind from young not from a stick or from fear.My parents never laid a hand on me,am I a scumbag?I learned from young to be disciplined,polite and how SS put it "not to touch hot things" but certainly not because someone beat me.Because smacking,"the stick" are form of violence towards your child,you BEAT them.You can ask ANY psychologist that corporal punishment leads to deviations in behavior and thinking.Sounds bad?IT IS BAD!
How do you keep a child from doing something bad?Showing him that he shouldn't,if he doesn't listen its your fault,your influence should be enough,if its not then go forth and educate with word and food for thought!

[RoKeT]

lol thats why violence and crime is rising... yet parents don't lay a hand on there kids anymore... i remember going to my granddads home buddy let me tell you i minded for him yet when i would get home to me ma i would be a little hellant??? why is that do you think... because parents don't disipline with a big effin paddle like there parents did lol

[Byrnes]

same here mate...

maybe if a few more parents used their brains and laid the law down at home we wouldn't have the scumbag-out of control-youth we have today...

damned politicly correct do-gooders could learn allot from a smack themselves!

Worse thing you can do to a child is smack him.The scumbags of today were "touched" and ignored.Discipline must be of the mind from young not from a stick or from fear.My parents never laid a hand on me,am I a scumbag?I learned from young to be disciplined,polite and how SS put it "not to touch hot things" but certainly not because someone beat me.Because smacking,"the stick" are form of violence towards your child,you BEAT them.You can ask ANY psychologist that corporal punishment leads to deviations in behavior and thinking.Sounds bad?IT IS BAD!
How do you keep a child from doing something bad?Showing him that he shouldn't,if he doesn't listen its your fault,your influence should be enough,if its not then go forth and educate with word and food for thought!

I agree.

[Iƒrit]

IMO if you need to act out in voilence as a parernt to your child then you are not ready to be a parent, bottom line. Volience is, but not limtied to, yelling, put downs, and any physical contact which may cause harm in any way.