parental discipline (smacking).

[Ashu]

lol thats why violence and crime is rising... yet parents don't lay a hand on there kids anymore... i remember going to my granddads home buddy let me tell you i minded for him yet when i would get home to me ma i would be a little hellant??? why is that do you think... because parents don't disipline with a big effin paddle like there parents did lol

I really don't want to insult you but you don't seem to grasp evolution and the basis of education...Your child is taught by WORD and SPEAKING to him,not what grampa did 50 years ago...Society does not get better because you spank and smack your kid but because you don't know how to get to him otherwise,you're being incapable does not excuse anything.FEAR and VIOLENCE add nothing but more FEAR and VIOLENCE!

[Brdavs]

Thats why stuff for babyproofing your house (stairs, electric plugs etc) exists.

You dont wait that your kid almosts electrecutes or horribly burns himself on the stove to introduce a pain stimulus to deter him from that in the future.
Thats a panicky response to a situation you allready fracked up by allowing it to get that far in the first place.

Your job is to safeguard him from harm not treat him like a puppy. Cos even avenger says, they remember.

oh yes, because as long as you safegaurd your house, the rest of the planet is magically safe too?

if I pad the corners of my tables, there are no sharp objects outside my front door

*twitches nose* <- gennie reference

You let your 4 year old venture into the world unsuprevised?

unless you chain it to your person, you cannot possibly expect it to be safe 100% of the time, and even then it is not completely free from harm

But under your logic you can pain condition him into safety.

So you take the approach of using slaps to detter him from all non preaproved as safe actions or what?

Cos if you don`t, you`re really just doing outside what I said you should also do inside, and inside your home you can eliminate the uncertainty.
He is out there being kept from mortal peril but a bruised knee wont kill him, nor will anything short of slapping him for doing anything new prevent him from it.
And he will learn more from skinning his knee than from your hand that circumstantually prevents him skinning it.

Your home is the only place where pain conditioning is effective, since you`re aware of potential dangers.
And since you ARE preaware of them, you can take the necessary precautions to neutraliue them without physical "violence".



If your kid electrecutes himself nobody will ask you "why didnt you slapp him silly so he`d know not to go near there".
They`ll ask you where the heck were you and why couldnt you spring the few bucks for those plastic thingamajigs that go into extensions so that kids dont zapp themselves.








P.S. the notion that if you dont hit your child that you`re not able to discpline him or raise him into a nondelinquent is ludicrous and just highlights your parenting limitations.

[RoKeT]

OMG SS and i just agreed i need to post this HOLY GOD save this convo this has never happened my life has been completed thank you jesus and god and my granddad for smacking my ass with a paddle!!!

but seriously lol i challenge you to a kid off buddy boy anyone lol my daughter is 2 and a half years old and i guarentee she listens better then someones child who has never given there child a little spanking i gaurentee it lol if your methods are so much better show me lol i would love to not have to smack her butt it hurts me more then it hurts her but it works... let me put it this way

if my daughter is climbing up on a table she falls off you don't think that could VERY SERIOUSLY hurt her yet a little spank on the butt... not anything that even hurts just enough to let her know that wat she is doing is wrong and scare her just a little bit...

well you put me up with those choices and i'll pick my daughters saftey everytime??? wouldn't you???

[[KMA]Avenger]

same here mate...

maybe if a few more parents used their brains and laid the law down at home we wouldn't have the scumbag-out of control-youth we have today...

damned politicly correct do-gooders could learn allot from a smack themselves!

Ive never been smacked really and ive came out good but i see where your coming from.

there are MANY people who have "come out ok" and they've never been smacked, which is VERY cool in my book, (this part is more or less at brvdas) but that also depends on MANY factors such as the childs temperament (which i would say is BIGGEST factor of all), the parents temperament. lets take my temperament for instance, i was always playful with my boys and we would roll around the floor for ages but when i say "enough son, its dinner time", i expect the child to listen and not the start running wild and punching his mum because he has to stop and eat....

@brvdas, do you have any kids?

[Byrnes]

I believe if you hit there kids and it does work then when they have kids they will hit theres and f they dont listen then they will get hit harder and then harder and then harder and so on.

[AncientAnubis]

If they backtalk, just give them a quick crack to that glass jaw.

[RoKeT]

rofl i never touch my daughter more then litterally a smack with my fingers strength??? it does not hurt her she is young she is like an animal sometimes and they say just a light smack a very light smack gets there attention and snaps them out of there one track mind better then talking to them does... look it up i am not abusive to my daughter lol nor would i ever EVER be in all actuallity i left my babies mama for smacking her in the mouth at 4 months old because she was tired i do not believe in abuse but to smack a childs butt light as possible to snap them out of a mind set that they have is far from abuse

[Ashu]

same here mate...

maybe if a few more parents used their brains and laid the law down at home we wouldn't have the scumbag-out of control-youth we have today...

damned politicly correct do-gooders could learn allot from a smack themselves!

Worse thing you can do to a child is smack him.The scumbags of today were "touched" and ignored.Discipline must be of the mind from young not from a stick or from fear.My parents never laid a hand on me,am I a scumbag?I learned from young to be disciplined,polite and how SS put it "not to touch hot things" but certainly not because someone beat me.Because smacking,"the stick" are form of violence towards your child,you BEAT them.You can ask ANY psychologist that corporal punishment leads to deviations in behavior and thinking.Sounds bad?IT IS BAD!
How do you keep a child from doing something bad?Showing him that he shouldn't,if he doesn't listen its your fault,your influence should be enough,if its not then go forth and educate with word and food for thought!

that is a load of rubbish...

the problem with psychology is that it is not effective on everyone because everyone thinks differently...

sure, you have the basics, but saying, thats hot do not touch, is NOT going to work on every single kid on the face of the planet

tell me, have you always done what you are told? throughout your entire life?

If I say don't touch, they'll ask why...

if I say its hot, you know darn well a chunk of kids would do it anyway

if I had said because its hot and if you touch it, you will be punished, the chance of them not doing it increases, is it going t prevent all of them, no but it will prevent some

to each their own, and I think the "a spanking is abuse" line is a load of garbage

lol thats why violence and crime is rising... yet parents don't lay a hand on there kids anymore... i remember going to my granddads home buddy let me tell you i minded for him yet when i would get home to me ma i would be a little hellant??? why is that do you think... because parents don't disipline with a big paddle like there parents did lol

amen!

to the principle, not the paddle XD

One of my best friends has PhDs in Education and Psychology and he fervently disagrees with you're assessment.On the matter of psychology i suggest you read more before saying i'm wrong...
If i tell you don't touch the hot cup,i'll tell you BECAUSE YOU GET BURNT,if he still touches it and gets burnt he will never touch it again.More children are likely to touch it out of SPITE because you beat him...and set the house on fire...and more...

[Iƒrit]

She/he aint listening to you cause she/he understands or respects you, she/he is listening cause she/he feels fear. You honestly feel that is the best and most effective way for your child to grow up hats off to you, to eaches own. GL and BW to you. Your teaching your child that Voilence can solve their problems, and hence why there are so many violent people.

[RoKeT]

i am in psych to buddy and i've never heard that theory i guess i'll have to look into it lol the truth is that we may never know every child is different and reacts differently to different measures but i can tell you one thing and it is my own personal experience and that is all that matters to me...

one my mother used to whoop the **Filtered** out of my ass when i messed up and guess wat i grew up to be a damn good man with a daughter who i raise damn well on my own because her mother is not in her life...

and two... my daughter never ever gets hurt from the little spankings i do and she listens to me she does not disobey me and she is the most respectful little girl you will meet

my methods are my methods i would never hurt my child in any way i love her more then any of you can possibly imagine unless you have a child

and my daughter does not fear me so bite your tounge before i rip it out of your mouth big guy

and i will not change them because in my personal opinion each child is different and if it works without harming the child and it works to the extent that it does for me... why the hell would i change it?

[Ashu]

SS what you say makes no sense and if you laugh and spit in the face of modern psychology i can only pity you...I know a lot of parents say "Fudge those psycho babble idiots imma gonna educate me them kids like me daddy used to do..." but modern man has learned that its more to education that what meets the eye...

[Brdavs]

@brvdas, do you have any kids?

And what difference does weather I do or do not make?

Are you implying the beatings are the only way to show parenting love and that any good parent will dish out the "litterar tough love"?

I`m sorry but I cant agree.

I allmost zapped myself trying to get the cristmas lights to work by sticking them in the powerplug when I was really small, but luckly I just shorted them in a puff of blue smoke.

My pop never hit, not even for that, he didnt have to. I was scared **Filtered** enough hiding under my bed for the next 2 hours on my own and didnt go near the wall in question again for a long time. He had to comfort me to get me from under there heh.
I didnt need a beating to get the message. Thats one of my earliest memmories, that how well it worked lol. Nor would a beating beforehand help maters, unless he picked a randome day, showed me that extension and slapped me silly to stay away, just in case.

And I dont have a criminal record now either lol.


Thats my point. Like tokoko says, he spanked her cos he was about to fall. "doing it for her safety" is just consoling yourself. Why did you discipline her? She didnt do anything wrong nor was she able to comprehend why was she disciplined yet. You introduced a negative pain reflex for your failure and as a future safenet, nothing else. You should be spanking yourself.

[Brdavs]

P.S. the notion that if you dont hit your child that you`re not able to discpline him or raise him into a nondelinquent is ludicrous and just highlights your parenting limitations.

and the notion that the methods that have worked for hundreds of years are utterly useless is no better

you need a combination of both, not pop-psychology nonsense

children need authority, the youth of today have no respect for anything/anyone, gee I wonder why?

maybe its because they have no consequences to their actions

Timmy, if you break that lamp your gonna get a time out
woop dee doo! what kind of reprecussion is sitting in a darn chair!?

No, I do not think every little thing should be disciplined with a slap or two, but being so nieve to think that everything can be handled with a simple no.... is rediculous!

Lets not get started on past notions that worked ok lol. A lot of things used to work that dont any more. Child labor for instance.

And ofc. just "no" doesnt cut it allways. But its a parents job to make sure a kid is not confronted with a particular danger till no doesnt suffice. You dont reflex train your kid for everything in life do you? Then why not give up reflex training him for the few things you do and take the 2-3 extra steps.

And again, physical violence is NOT the only means of disciplining a kid.

[RoKeT]

when the **Filtered** did this turn into a beating thing? anyways???

should i child be beat ABSOLUTLEY NOT i **Filtered** hate people who beat there children

but should a child get smacked a little tiny bit on the butt if wat they do is dangerous to themselves i see no problem with it

aslong as you do not slap your child to hurt them then i see no problem with it... honestly if you do not hurt your child and you do it to protect them there is nothing wrong with it

if you do not hurt your child is the key word

if it is to snap them out of a mindset then go ahead aslong as you don't do it hard...

in my opinion if you do it hard enough to even leave the smallest red mark and i am there i will whoop your ass

but if you do not and you just do it very lightly and it doesn't even hurt the child then there is no harm done to either party

[[KMA]Avenger]

lets say I take a jot ride in the car? what you gonna do to me?

if it was my 12 year old?! BEAT HIM HALF TO DEATH...wanna bet he never does anything like that again?

at all those who say its abuse i say at those that say i am admitting i dont know how to be a farther and raise my kids...tell that to all 3 of my sons who are top in all subjects at school!

at the end of the day, it hasn't hurt any of my kids and i have shown and given more love to my kids than discipline...why is that?! because when i speak they listen and no shouting or violence is needed!!!

@brvdas, do you have any kids?

And what difference does weather I do or do not make?

Are you implying the beatings are the only way to show parenting love and that any good parent will dish out the "litterar tough love"?

I`m sorry but I cant agree.

I allmost zapped myself trying to get the cristmas lights to work by sticking them in the powerplug when I was really small, but luckly I just shorted them in a puff of blue smoke.

My pop never hit, not even for that, he didnt have to. I was scared **Filtered** enough hiding under my bed for the next 2 hours on my own and didnt go near the wall in question again for a long time. I didnt need a beating to get the message. Nor would a beating beforehand help maters, unless he picked a randome day, showed me that extension and slapped me silly to stay away, just in case.

And I dont have a criminal record now either lol.


Thats my point. Like tokoko says, he spanked her cos he was about to fall. "doing it for her safety" is just consoling yourself. Why did you discipline her? She didn't do anything wrong nor was she able to comprehend why was she disciplined yet. You introduced a negative pain reflex for your failure and as a future safenet, nothing else. You should be spanking yourself.

did you even bother to read my opening post? did you even try to understand where i was coming from with regards to smacking??

do you have any kids???