"You have to earn my respect"

[deleted]

This is where intellectual honesty comes in. People dying in africa is horrible. IT is something that humanity as a whole should care about. But in all honesty....do I RESPECT them for dying. Uh. no.

I sympathize. I might even empathize. I am horrified for them. But no. I don't respect them. Why should I? I doubt very much they would say that they respect me. And quite frankly I am not offended. I am not even a little bit hurt by that.

Respect is not, no matter what scenario you mention or what deep thinker has spouted last, something that comes for free. When you say respect all mankind, you are not actually speaking of respect. I know you THINK you are. I even hear you throw in the word respect itself. But analyze what you mean.

You mean care for them. Think about them as better than yourself. Attempt to assist them and make their life better in any way possible. This is by definition Love. Therefore you want us to Love all mankind. Ok that I can see. But even then, respect and Love are [ironic this bit is] BY Definition different.

Main Entry: 1re·spect
Pronunciation: ri-'spekt
Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English, from Latin respectus, literally, act of looking back, from respicere to look back, regard, from re- + specere to look -- more at SPY
1 : a relation or reference to a particular thing or situation <remarks having respect to an earlier plan>
2 : an act of giving particular attention : CONSIDERATION
3 a : high or special regard : ESTEEM b : the quality or state of being esteemed c plural : expressions of respect or deference <paid our respects>

Main Entry: 1love
Pronunciation: 'l&v
Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English, from Old English lufu; akin to Old High German luba love, Old English lEof dear, Latin lubEre, libEre to please
4 a : unselfish loyal and benevolent concern for the good of another: as (1) : the fatherly concern of God for humankind (2) : brotherly concern for others b : a person's adoration of God

So the real problem is not the lack of respect. But the lack of a proper understanding of common speech. And that is of course no surprise to me.

[Nicholai Brocov]

I'm confused a little by this topic then, If you don't really care about gaining the respect of the majority of people that say 'you have to earn my respect'.

Than why make an entire topic acknowledging something that you detest so?

I don't think respect should be earned, because that means that it's some kind of prize or way of stating that you can 'win over' the respect of people. Respect isn't an object or tangible in any sense of the word, it's a feeling you have and try to show for someone. Which pierces hate, sadness, happiness and any emotion in between.

The word respect is too watered down these days... It's meaningless until someone truly knows what respect is and how to show it.

[LBWMTE- D4rk S1de]

What I am saying is, I can't name a single person who I have ever met that I do not have some kind of respect for, I can name people I have little respect for, but noone that I have none for. Why would I assume that anybody doesn't deserve respect when I don't have a single example of someone in my life for which I do not have respect. You bought love into this (more specifically christian agape type love) and attempt to say that a universal feeling of the value of a person is love, and I agree, it is, but by loving them, I am giving them respect, by loving them I am giving them unique value of being deserving of love.
"2 : an act of giving particular attention : CONSIDERATION
3 a : high or special regard : ESTEEM"
I feel you are defining your respect as valueing someone's traits, I am valuing their trait as a human being, in the assurity that as I stated above, whether I am aware of the trait or not, they still have them, so I respect them. You don't respect people becauase you haven't seeen any specific traits to respect, whereas I am optimistic and beleive that everyone has atleast some traits that are worthy of my respect.

[Acronon]

punks and people so up themselves you couldn't get thier head out their arse with a nuke.

Disclaimer: Did you find that last bit offensive in anyway? If you did; cry me a river and gag me.

This shows that you will drop to their level and shows that you show little respect for anyone that doesn't give it to you.

Is this not what you are complaining about them doing to you?

[deleted]

Why would I assume that anybody doesn't deserve respect when I don't have a single example of someone in my life for which I do not have respect. You bought love into this (more specifically christian agape type love) and attempt to say that a universal feeling of the value of a person is love, and I agree, it is, but by loving them, I am giving them respect, by loving them I am giving them unique value of being deserving of love...I feel you are defining your respect as valueing someone's traits, I am valuing their trait as a human being, in the assurity that as I stated above, whether I am aware of the trait or not, they still have them, so I respect them. You don't respect people becauase you haven't seeen any specific traits to respect, whereas I am optimistic and beleive that everyone has atleast some traits that are worthy of my respect.

I do not make relationship lightly. Therefor, when I give someone a certain value or respect they know it means something.

You are also dealing with this from your peculiar [i.e. particular to you] world view. You see everyone as deserving respect. I, from my vantage point, see few deserving of respect.

I suppose this is the issue when you come right down to it. Does everyone have something good or attractive in them?

You would say yes. Me...I'm a cynic. I say probably not.

[LBWMTE- D4rk S1de]

This is the problem with argueing about subjective ideas, you end up compromising Glad we got there tho.

[deleted]

there you go again with your far-out all accepting ways....I mean C'mon!!!!

[LBWMTE- D4rk S1de]

Peace and love baby! Karma will see you through...

[Zeratul]

respect should be given freely, (and lost freely as well), but friendship should be earned...

[Wolf359]

Penegal is correct in that basic courteous respect should be a given. Obviously, how much that respect grows or decreases is then up to how the individual conducts themselves.

I also agree that here is a lot of bigoted 'You must earn my respect' around these days. Yes, greater respect must be earned, but to tell someone that you must earn their respect is, frankly, pathetically egotistical.

For example - every single newcomer to the forum (without exception) has a basic level of respect from me, as a mod (and player - when I was one). Now, as long as they do not persistently break teh forum rules or disrespect other users, that level of respect will remain, and may even decrease, dependent upon their conduct. However, I quickly lose respect for those who show no willing to adhere to the rules, or simply use the forum for their own disrespectful babble.

[Reality]

My view of respect is the following.

Respect is reflected in how you treat others. To respect a person is to treat them with dignity. Respecting someone ought not reflect your view of them, but rather your perspective of yourself. How can a self-respecting people spit on another until they impress them?

Such actions would lose a certain level of my respect, but their identity as a human being is something that I cannot spit on or cease to respect, without losing self-respect.

Of course, sometimes, when a person does something inhumane, they can lose that identity as a human being... Is that a pun? Maybe. Maybe it was just intended to have that etymology.

= Reality =

[BELISKNER]

Much like what Wolf said. People who say 'you must earn respect' are the ones who lose my respect.

When I talk to someone I treat them as I would any person meeting for the first time, polite and courteous.

Respect and Courtesy are different.

Over my nearly 2 years playing this game, many people have added me on MSN and said such things like;

Sir, Oh great one, The almighty Beliskner etc and personally I don't like that, I always tell people to call me Dan. Some people believe that because their account is better than another persons' that they are instantly better than them.

Back on my point, the amount of people I truly respect in SGW you can count on your hands. My point being, when I speak to someone new I have a 'common respect' for them and am polite but I do not respect them in a profound sense, you don't have to earn my respect, all people are given the same 'common respect' when I first talk to them and like I said, if they aren't being very nice they lose part of that common respect. If they are nice and polite then over time the common respect may turn into a deeper respect.

To sum it up, people who demand respect are the ones who have my least respect!

One of the main people I respect above all is Inferno. Why? Because we have been friends now since about April 05 and not only is he a great friend but someone I can completely 110% trust with anything and he is the type of friend that won't run for cover if things get messy. Basically, true friend and top bloke!

There is a few other I truly respect but for the most part, people I know just have my respect in a friendship sense (See my bullet points below).


3 Layers :P

• Profound Respect - Very few people have this, you can count them on your fingers.
  
• Respect - A few people have this, friendships and such things.
  
• Common Respect - What everyone starts with when I first speak to them.

Respect is not always earned but rather grows over time.

[TheSoulHarvester]

make a club respectful? players

or something, lets all name our one planet with the name

[Mr GoodKat]

Beliskner probably said it better than me.

3 Layers

* Profound Respect - Very few people have this, you can count them on your fingers.

* Respect - A few people have this, friendships and such things.

* Common Respect - What everyone starts with when I first speak to them.

I find this discussion kind of silly. Of course we don't respect everyone equally. That is impossible to do even for the most god-like person.

It's not about respecting everyone equally. It's about respecting people even if you have only just met them.

It is simply a matter of I know you. I have reason to respect you. If I don't even know you exist of COURSE I don't respect you.

It's not about respecting people who have absolutly no knowledge of, either. It's about giving someone you have just met respect.

On top of that, even those I have passing acquaintance with do not generate a certain amount of respect. Why should it? Respect means that i have reason to hold you in regard. Be that good regard or bad regard. If I have no intimate knowledge of WHO you really are, then I cannot possibly hold you in any kind of respect. Thus it is that respect is EARNED. You earn it thru interaction.

It's not respect that means you have to hold me in regard. It's me being human that means you should hold me in regard. If you give me respect freely as soon as i meet you, and treat me as such, then i do something to loose this respect; Then you should be able to say that you don't hold me in any respect.

Manners and the societal etiquette and niceties are there to break the ice and allow interaction to occur at all. They help you earn good respect and shield you from negative respect.

No no no. They help you earn friendships. If you're a nice person, then you will earn friendships with people. As Beliskner said, friendship respect is another layer. We're talking about the basic respect you should get when you first see someone.

To say that I owe anyone respect as a basis for dealing is not only moronic but idiotic. I owe no-one anything. Think of it this way.

This is the egotistical-ness i'm talking about. "I owe the world nothing!". Actually, you do. You owe the world and it's inhabitants everything. The life you lead would be worthless, if it was not for the people around you. You owe everyone atleast something, if not everything.

The phone rings. MUST i pick it up and answer it? Of course not. I choose to interact with the caller. Therefor because it is a choice, they're receiving something from ME. Hence they are privileged to be granted a hearing. I do not owe them my time. I do not owe them my thoughts or opinions. I would be just as right to tell them to go away as I would to agree to speak with them. This is the basis for good manners and etiquette.

You're always receiving something, for someone too. So you should feel privaledged for being able to survive. Pay those peopel some respect.

But respect is what takes you from status of acquaintance to friend. Or higher. And that indeed, must be earned.

I agree with you here. More respect means a friendship. But before even this, there must be some basic respect.

I'm confused a little by this topic then, If you don't really care about gaining the respect of the majority of people that say 'you have to earn my respect'.

Than why make an entire topic acknowledging something that you detest so?

So they can change their ways, hopefully.

[Mystake]

I give everyone a basic amount of respect though I keep a skeptical eye on them.


My respect is furthered once I know they respect me and my opinions

i don't let people earn it, i let them strengthen it.